Remember back in elementary school when boys expressed their affection by tormenting girls in the schoolyard? Well, I've found its modern day equivalent: comment bombing a chick's Facebook page.
What do I mean by “comment-bombing” in the first damn place? Simple: habitually leaving insipid, pointless non sequiturs—or those friggin’ thumbs-up approvals (that’s “Arrr, this be pleasin’ to me eye” in Pirate)—for almost any status update I make. The worst part? None of said comments are ever direct enough for one to determine if the guy actually likes you, is cyber-stalking, or simply has too much free time on his hands.
It’s long been known that I’m a very direct person—almost painfully blunt to a fault. This is probably why I’m equally baffled and annoyed by the comment bombing methodology. If you’re interested, ask me out. Send me a private message, even email seems more intimate than “liking” the fact that I had Thai food for lunch. It just seems so trite; and I have no time for that bullshit.
So here’s my advice to all of those guys guilty of this: Shit or get off the pot. Seriously. Girls like assertiveness and forthrightness, not comment-bombing bottom feeders. Be direct, ask the girl out, or stop before she’s so annoyed she blocks you altogether. Who knows? You might even get laid out of it.
And if you think I’m directing this at you, I probably am.